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Surfing The Waves of Change and Grief: A Mindful Perspective

 



Change and grief are deeply intertwined. When life shifts, as it inevitably does, it’s often accompanied by a longing for what once was. Whether it’s a life we used to live, friendships that have faded, or even the days when work or school felt exciting and fulfilling, these moments of transition bring a sense of loss.

This longing is natural. It’s part of the human experience to form attachments—to people, routines, places, and even versions of ourselves. When change disrupts those attachments, grief follows. But how often do we pause to truly acknowledge this connection between change and grief?

Grieving What Was

Grief isn’t always about losing someone; sometimes, it’s about losing something intangible. It’s the sense of mourning for a life chapter that has closed or for a spark that once lit up our days but now feels dim. For many, it’s the longing for a time when things felt more certain, more alive, or simply more aligned with who they believed themselves to be.

Change—whether it’s a job transition, a move, a shift in relationships, or even personal growth—requires us to let go of the familiar. And in that letting go, we can feel untethered, as though we’ve lost a piece of ourselves.

The Weight of Longing

Longing often carries a silent heaviness. It whispers of a past that we can’t fully reclaim and a future that remains uncertain. In today’s world, this can manifest in many ways:

  • The ache of friendships that faded as lives took different paths.
  • The yearning for a career that once felt full of purpose but now feels draining.
  • The wistfulness for a simpler time, before responsibilities and complexities layered over the joy of living.

Yet, within that longing lies an opportunity. It’s an invitation to confront what we’re holding onto and to ask ourselves what we truly need in the present moment.

Mindfully Facing Change and Grief

Mindfulness offers a pathway through the intertwined experiences of change and grief. It invites us to notice what is happening within us—the emotions, the thoughts, the sensations—without judgment. Here are some ways to approach this process:

  1. Name the Loss
    Often, we skip over grief, assuming it’s unwarranted unless tied to a major life event. But naming what you’ve lost—whether it’s a version of yourself, a connection, or a sense of purpose—can bring clarity and validation.

  2. Honor the Longing
    Instead of resisting or ignoring the longing you feel, try sitting with it. What does it reveal about what you value? Longing often points to desires and needs that still hold meaning for us.

  3. Find Gratitude for the Past
    While it’s easy to dwell on what’s gone, reflecting on the gifts of those moments can bring a sense of closure. Gratitude doesn’t negate grief, but it can help us carry the past with us in a lighter way.

  4. Embrace the Unknown
    Change brings uncertainty, but it also brings potential. The space between what was and what will be is fertile ground for growth and discovery. Mindfulness can help us remain present in this space, finding beauty even in the discomfort.

Moving Forward

If you’re navigating change and grief, know that you’re not alone. These experiences are universal, even though they can feel isolating in the moment. Take time to reflect, rest, and reconnect with yourself.

Change will always be a part of life, as will grief. But within every ending is a beginning, and within every loss is the opportunity to grow. The journey isn’t about rushing through the discomfort but about learning to be with it—to honor what was and to open your heart to what could be.

An Invitation to Practice

When you feel overwhelmed by change or grief, take a moment to pause. Close your eyes, let the light barely filter through your eyelids, and allow yourself to rest in that space. Notice the longing, the ache, and the beauty of being alive. It’s all part of the practice of living—and of loving the life that’s in front of you.

Let this practice be a gentle reminder: nothing is ever truly lost. It transforms, evolves, and lives on in new ways.

It's all practice

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